Who Should You Choose as a Companion?
Notes taken from the lecture: Who should you choose as a companion?
Speaker: [Hassan Somlai] (Ibn Qudamah) mentioned that not everyone is suitable to be taken as a companion. You must be able to differentiate the one who is accompanying you. This companion should possess these 5 traits as follows:
1) That he has sound reasoning (Aql- Intellect)
2) Good Character (Akhlaq- That he does not have bad manners)
3) He is not a sinner (Fasiq)
4) Not an innovator
5) Not a person who loves this duniya
The Explanation of these Qualities & the Opposite
1) Why should we want to have a companion with sound reasoning?Because the one with a sound intellectwill benefit you. No benefit will be taken from mixing with a fool, someone that wants to waste your time. Mixing with a fool as your companion will cause harm, because he’s a fool. (Ibn qudamah) mentions imagine if a person’s was on fire, and the fool trying to help him, gives him oil, because he is a fool, rather than distinguishing the fire he increases it, and therefore he causes more harm than benefit. As for Someone withsound judgement, he understands things, and therefore he is able to benefit you with many things.
2) The companion has good manners, someone with sound judgement might have temper issues, or he obeys his desires, So avoid accompanying this type of person.
3) The Fasiq does not fear Allah… the one who does not fear Allah, you are not safe from there harm, or there presence, because a fasiq if you are with him, he may do or say things, and the harms might affect you.
4) As for the innovator, his innovation might affect you. The sahabas would say, do not sit with the people of innovation, why? They will make your heart sick, doubts may penetrate your heart and might never leave it, doubts are like Rabies in a dog, if it bites you, you will be affected.
5) As for the one Chasing after duniya, money, etc. then leave off associating with this type of companion, why? Being around him, he will not remind you of the remembrance of Allah, and if there is no rememberance of the Creator, then it opens the door to shaytaan.
Ibn Qudamah: If you are looking for a companion who does not have any deficiency, you will never find him; the prophet said: “The People are like camels, out of one hundred, one can hardly find a single camel suitable to ride”. (Sahih-Bukhari Book 76 – Hadith 505)
Ibn Mubarak said: The believers makes excuse for his brother, the munfiq chases after his faults
Ibn fudayl said: A person should over-look the faults or slips of his brother/ sister in Islam, not have a bad thought, and should always think of the best of what they have done.
Abu Hurayrah reported that Allah’s Messenger said, “Beware of suspicion, for verily suspicion is the most misleading form of conversation.” (Collected by Al-Bukhaaree, Muslim, and Abu Daawood)
Concealing people faults is the quality of the people of religion, be patient with one another.
The prophet said the meaning of which: “The Muslim who mixes with the people and bears patiently their hurtful words, is better than one who does not mix with people and does not show patience under their abuse”. (Related by Ibn-Maajah, Tirmidhi)
The ulama of the past say: ‘Precision is what you memorise and what you write’ Muslim, read this with an open heart and open mind, truly seeking the Face of you Lord. Bukhari: has a Chapter where he mentioned: Knowledge precedes speech and action, and the proof is the saying of Allah, the most High, “Know that none have the right to be worshipped (in truth) except Allah”.So don’t be from those whose speech and action preceed their knowledge. And refuge is sought in Allah from such a state!
Ibn taymiyyah, what did he say to Ibnul qayim? “Make your heart like a mirror, not a sponge that absorbs everything”
DO NOT GO EXTREME IN THIS DEEN! WHY? When the prophet spoke about the Khawaraj, he said they will leave the religon as the arrow goes through the prey, He futher mentions they are the dogs of the hellfire. Look at these descriptions, they went extreme in the deen, and as for innovation then it is more beloved to ibless than sinning.
Muslims your purpose of creation was not
‘GET RICH and GET DIE TRYIN’, but rather to worship Allah.